Thursday, June 6, 2013

Midwife The Magnificent

We've reached the home stretch of the whole pregnancy thing I think, and I'm definitely psyched about that. Yesterday we had our last midwife appointment before I hit my due date, which means there's a something percent chance I will go into labor before Monday, although I was told that it is fairly common for first time mothers with pregnancies as normal as mine to give birth after their due date rather than before it. Which means that there is an even greater something percent chance that I will still be pregnant after Monday of next week. Who am I kidding? I'll probably still be pregnant two Monday's from now with my luck.

The appointment was lovely though. Mr. Llama was able to get the morning off of work to accompany me and we met the second midwife for the first time. Her name is Lin and she has the most adorable British accent and she calls you "lovely" and gives you a hug because you're really very stressed out and she can tell. And then she tells you to "stop reading" those birth books you mentioned because at this point its all going to happen anyway, so what she really wants for you to do is go home and start visualizing yourself in really good labor (cue labor imitation now, complete with hunched shoulders and moaning), and then she wants you to visualize your baby coming down the birth canal very easily with your hips very wide and the baby comparatively small. And that's the trick.

Oh and plus also take some Evening Primrose Oil starting tonight because it will help to soften the cervix.

So basically I love her because she is super hip and grandmotherly and also very good at making me feel like this whole labor and delivery thing is going to be a cake walk or something equally as easy because honestly I have no idea what a cake walk is or if it is, in fact, easy.

Something else she helped with at the appointment was pin pointing what my biggest fear was about this whole thing. No one had ever really asked me directly before "what is your biggest fear?", but she did, and I was kinda surprised at my answer.

"That I'll be hooked up to all sorts of IV's and Monitors and strapped to a bed and end up cut and C-sectioned." So not dealing with the pain of labor at all (apparently I don't think that is a super big deal?) but that people will do things to me and I will lose control of the situation. And then Lin helped me to see that really, none of that was necessary and that the chances of me being forced into having any sort of intervention I didn't want are super low given my history and, in her words, my "good big feet and high cheek bones which mean my pelvis will be perfect for birthing this baby."

I left the appointment far less stressed than I had been about getting the baby out--because as long as the baby is happy in there I can deal with the discomfort--and less afraid that I'll end up with an induction and an epidural and a slowed labor and an emergency C-section. So over-all, my last appointment before I'm "over-due" was a success I think.

OH OH OH, and I got a vaccine! My first since I was five years old. I may have started to freak out a little when they came into the room with the needle, because I mean, it had been 18 YEARS since I'd had one of those things... but I also knew that the TDAP was kinda important given Whooping Cough season is coming up and it reaches epidemic levels sometimes in this area... and baby needs antibodies to it from me. So I sucked it up, and I let the midwife in training stick me in the arm, and it hurt basically not at all which was surprising, because when I was five the nurse had to hold me down something fierce to get those needles in me. I mean, it hurt less than getting blood drawn even, which I've basically gotten 98% used to.

After that all that was left to do was schedule my first NST (Non-Stress Test) and over-due ultrasound to check fluid levels to make sure everything is still going swimmingly (haha, get it? Fluids? Swimmingly? I'm so funny) on Monday. Which we did. And then we came home and Mr. Llama left for work and I watched Harry Potter some more and it was great.

The end.

Now here is a selfie of me yesterday at 39 weeks, 3 days. Yes there are spots on my bathroom mirror. Stop judging me with your judging eyes.

Have you ever visualized before? Did it go well? Can one overdose on Evening Primrose Oil? If you had to guess, on what day will this Baby Llama be born? 

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